Empty Love Tank

Shortly before I left, I had a conversation with a guy about long distance relationships. He told me how much he desires to hold hands and be affectionate with the person he is dating and emphasized how much he needs those things. I thought about my friends and family who are military spouses and how difficult it is every time they have to say goodbye to their loved ones. In my head, I told myself no amount of distance would change how I felt about someone. I knew his love language was quality time and I knew that no amount of Skype dates would ever be the same as sitting next to each other on the couch watching a movie. But I still wanted to try to make it work. I didn’t realize at the time how important those things actually are. 

If you’ve heard of the book The 5 love languages, you know your love language, maybe the love language of your closest friends and family members, and you know what it means to have an empty love tank. Well, my love tank has been running on low lately. My two highest ranking love languages go hand in hand, physical touch and quality time. Back in the states I had standing monthly dates with most of my girlfriends. I alternated weekdays and weekends, re-arranged tennis matches and scheduled in advance to ensure we got time together. I needed to see them and spend time with them. We could talk on the phone or message via facebook but it wasn’t the same as having genuine quality time with them. I needed the laughter and the facial expressions and I needed the “see you later” hug.

I’ve been missing my friends and family a lot lately and as the two month mark of being in Korea approaches, I am reminded of how many of my monthly dates I won’t be getting and it makes me sad. Fortunately, the little kindergarten boogers and their affectionate ways have kept me distracted thus far, but this past week one of my love bugs was gone on vacation. His name is Tim, we call him Tiny Tim and every morning he runs up to me, grabs my leg to wrap his tiny arms around me and tells me “I love you Brandy Teacher.” Oh how I look forward to Tim’s hugs each morning. I didn’t realize how much they mattered until I didn’t get them for a week. This morning Tim returned from his vacation and as he ran up to hug me I didn’t want to let him go. He is a very affectionate child and all morning long he more than made up for the days he was gone. He sat in my lap, climbed on top of my head, rubbed my back and held onto my arms as I taught the lesson and I just ate it up! He gave me more than enough love to fill my love tank up and helped me get through the sad moments of missing my friends and family. 

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